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Author Topic: Dangerous Hacker!, The Bitchchecker Story
blacky
VoivodFan
Member # 2

posted April 26, 2005 15:44     Profile for blacky   Email blacky     Send New Private Message   Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote
I'm reposting this story because it is very funny and I'm a funny guy......
Received an email from a friend today, the original story was from the forum of http://totalillusions.net

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Never guessed this would have gotten this amount of traffic. This is the story about a hacker who had little problems... Original from the german site http://www.stophiphop.de/, story can be found here: http://www.beast.mos-worlds.de/modules/new...php?storyid=184, please include this link if you repost this anywhere (site might be down, quite a lot of people are reading this).

In case you don't speak german (just as this hacker), I've tried a little translation to english. I might have made some spelling errors, but the original spelling wasn't perfect either. The guy really said "buy buy" in the german version. I've posted this on the forum on http://www.desertcombat.com before, so if this looks familiar, might be the same. I've corrected some mistakes and put the < > back to the right version (The DC forum does not support them). All censoring was done by this particular forum here.
Notice that in germany we get DST earlier than in the US.

The story starts (I'm shortcutting here) with an [Please control your cussing] insulting everyone on the IRC channel. Most people there believed it was rather funny. To quote him: "we [Please control your cussing] satanists victims winos like you in the ass every day" (this did not make sense in german, either. The translator). But it got even more funny.

For information: The dangerous hacker is called bitchchecker and the one being hacked and original author of the comments, who is talking here, is known as Elch. 127.0.0.1 is always the IP-adress of the computer you're currently using, any request there will return to your computer.

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* bitchchecker (~java@euirc-a97f9137.dip.t-dialin.net) Quit (Ping timeout#)
* bitchchecker (~java@euirc-61a2169c.dip.t-dialin.net) has joined #stopHipHop
<bitchchecker> why do you kick me
<bitchchecker> can't you discus normally
<bitchchecker> answer!
<Elch> we didn't kick you
<Elch> you had a ping timeout: * bitchchecker (~java@euirc-a97f9137.dip.t-dialin.net) Quit (Ping timeout#)
<bitchchecker> what ping man
<bitchchecker> the timing of my pc is right
<bitchchecker> i even have dst
<bitchchecker> you banned me
<bitchchecker> amit it you son of a bitch
<HopperHunter|afk> LOL
<HopperHunter|afk> shit you're stupid, DST^^
<bitchchecker> shut your mouth WE HAVE DST!
<bitchchecker> for two weaks already
<bitchchecker> when you start your pc there is a message from windows that DST is applied.
<Elch> You're a real computer expert
<bitchchecker> shut up i hack you
<Elch> ok, i'm quiet, hope you don't show us how good a hacker you are ^^
<bitchchecker> tell me your network number man then you're dead
<Elch> Eh, it's 129.0.0.1
<Elch> or maybe 127.0.0.1
<Elch> yes exactly that's it: 127.0.0.1 I'm waiting for you great attack
<bitchchecker> in five minutes your hard drive is deleted
<Elch> Now I'm frightened
<bitchchecker> shut up you'll be gone
<bitchchecker> i have a program where i enter your ip and you're dead
<bitchchecker> say goodbye
<Elch> to whom?
<bitchchecker> to you man
<bitchchecker> buy buy
<Elch> I'm shivering thinking about such great Hack0rs like you
* bitchchecker (~java@euirc-61a2169c.dip.t-dialin.net) Quit (Ping timeout#)

What happened is clear: That guy entered his own IP-Adress in his mighty Hack-Tool and crashed his own PC. This way, the attack on my PC was a failure. I was already starting to think that I did not have to worry, but a good hacker never calls it a day. Two minutes later he returned.

* bitchchecker (~java@euirc-b5cd558e.dip.t-dialin.net) has joined #stopHipHop
<bitchchecker> dude be happy my pc crashed otherwise you'd be gone
<Metanot> lol
<Elch> bitchchecker: Then try hacking me again... I still have the same IP: 127.0.0.1
<bitchchecker> you're so stupid man
<bitchchecker> say buy buy
<Metanot> ah, [Please control your cussing] off
<bitchchecker> buy buy elch
* bitchchecker (~java@euirc-b5cd558e.dip.t-dialin.net) Quit (Ping timeout#)

There was a tension in the room... Would he manage, after these two failures, to crash my PC? I waited. Nothing happened. I felt relieve... Six minutes passed by until he prepared the next wave of attack. Being a Hacker, who usually cracks whole data centers, he knew what his problem was now.

* bitchchecker (~java@euirc-9ff3c180.dip.t-dialin.net) has joined #stopHipHop
<bitchchecker> elch you son of a bitch
<Metanot> bitchchecker how old are you?
<Elch> What's up bitchchecker?
<bitchchecker> you have a frie wal
<bitchchecker> fire wall
<Elch> maybe, i don't know
<bitchchecker> i'm 26
<Metanot> such behaviour with 26?
<Elch> how did you find out that I have a firewall?
<Metanot> tststs this is not very nice missy
<bitchchecker> because your gay fire wall directed my turn off signal back to me
<bitchchecker> be a man turn that shit off
<Elch> cool, didn't know this was possible.
<bitchchecker> thn my virus destroys your pc man
<Metanot> are you hacking yourselves?
<Elch> yes bitchchecker is trying to hack me
<Metanot> he bitchchecker if you're a hacker you have to get around a firewall even i can do that
<bitchchecker> yes man i hack the elch but the sucker has a fire wall the
<Metanot> what firewall do you have?
<bitchchecker> like a girl
<Metanot> firewall is normal a normal hacker has to be able to get past it...you girl^^
<He> Bitch give yourself a jackson and chill you're letting them provoce you and give those little girls new material all the time
<bitchchecker> turn the firewall off then i send you a virus [Please control your cussing]er
<Elch> Noo
<Metanot> he bitchchecker why turn it off, you should turn it off
<bitchchecker> you're afraid
<bitchchecker> i don't wanna hack like this if he hides like a girl behind a fire wall
<bitchchecker> elch turn off your shit wall!
<Metanot> i wanted to say something about this, do you know the definition of hacking??? if he turns of the firewall that's an invitation and that has nothing to do with hacking
<bitchchecker> shut up
<Metanot> lol
<bitchchecker> my grandma surfs with fire wall
<bitchchecker> and you suckers think you're cool and don't dare going into the internet without a fire wall


He calls me girly and says only his grandma would use a firewall. I know that elder people are much more intelligent then younger, but I couldn't let that rest. To see whether he really is a good hacker I lie and let everything as it is. I don't have a firewall at all, only my router.

<Elch> bitchchecker, a collegue showed me how to turn the firewall off. Now you can try again
<Metanot> bitchhacker can't hack
<Black<TdV>> nice play on words ^^
<bitchchecker> wort man
<Elch> bitchchecker: I'm still waiting for your attack!
<Metanot> how many times again he is no hacker
<bitchchecker> man do you want a virus
<bitchchecker> tell me your ip and it deletes your hard drive
<Metanot> lol ne give it up i'm a hacker myself and i know how hackers behave and i can tell you 100.00% you're no hacker..^^
<Elch> 127.0.0.1
<Elch> it's easy
<bitchchecker> lolololol you so stupid man you'll be gone
<bitchchecker> and are the first files being deleted
<Elch> mom...
<Elch> i'll take a look

In panic I started the Windows Explorer, my heart beating faster. Had I under-estimated him?

<bitchchecker> don't need to rescue you can't son of a bitch
<Elch> that's bad
<bitchchecker> elch you idiout your hard drive g: is deleted
<Elch> yes, there's nothing i can do about it
<bitchchecker> and in 20 seconds f: is gone

Yes, true, G: and F: were gone. Did I ever have them? Doesn't matter, I did not have time to think, I was scared. bitchchecker was comforting me with a music tip.

<bitchchecker> tupac rules
<bitchchecker> elch you son of a bitch your f: is gone and e: too

Drive E Oh my god... All the games are there! And the vacation pictures! I instantly take a look. Everything still there. But the hacker said it was deleted....
Or isn't it happening on my computer?


<bitchchecker> and d: is at 45% you idiot lolololol
<He> why doesn't meta say anything
<Elch> he's probably rolling on the floor laughing
<Black<TdV>> ^^
<bitchchecker> your d: is gone
<He> go on BITCH

The guy is good: My CD-drive is allegedly deleted! Bitchchecker turned my ancient disk sucker into a burner! But how did he do this? I'll have to ask him. Some encourage him. He himself is giving advice how to avoid the disaster on my hard drives.

<bitchchecker> elch man you're so stupid never give your ip on the internet
<bitchchecker> i'm already at c: 30 percent

Should I tell him he's not attacking my computer?

* bitchchecker (~java@euirc-9ff3c180.dip.t-dialin.net) Quit (Ping timeout#)

Too late... It's 20:22 when we get the last message of our hacker with the alias "bitchchecker". We see that he has a "Ping timeout". We haven't seen him since then... must be the Daylight Saving Time.

Notice: We are well completely aware that maybe bitchchecker was just playing a game with us. He also claimed to have german as his major field of study.

<bitchchecker> shut up man i have advanced german


enjoy!


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LyKcantropen
VoivodFan
Member # 162

posted April 26, 2005 17:15     Profile for LyKcantropen   Email LyKcantropen     Send New Private Message   Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote
Haha!

Mr. Bitchchecker goes into the "stultifyingly ill-informed" category.


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Va¢ärmeS
VoivodFan
Member # 47

posted April 26, 2005 18:26     Profile for Va¢ärmeS   Email Va¢ärmeS     Send New Private Message   Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote
Hilarious!

I love that quote:

quote:
<bitchchecker> say buy buy

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>>> C'est fini l'école...à souère c'est Voïvod! <<<
-Snake, december 1984


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Ne0rC
VoivodFan
Member # 163

posted April 28, 2005 16:56     Profile for Ne0rC   Email Ne0rC     Send New Private Message   Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote
Training to be on Whitehat side.

But yea, that guy was just a script kiddie.

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nell
VoivodFan
Member # 171

posted April 29, 2005 05:58     Profile for nell   Email nell     Send New Private Message   Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote
Hey Blacky! You a Residents fan?
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nell
VoivodFan
Member # 171

posted April 29, 2005 08:30     Profile for nell   Email nell     Send New Private Message   Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote
Sorry, that was really off-topic, but i was just wondering about your avatar!
I was thinking that bitchchecker reminded me of a little troll we used to know. Maybe she (tried to) learn German and took up hacking to pass the time...

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infoterror
VoivodFan
Member # 568

posted May 03, 2005 15:50     Profile for infoterror   Email infoterror     Send New Private Message   Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote
http://www.phrack.org/

Best place to learn.

Original hacking was not white/black hat division. That's almost like the Christian invasion of Pagan Europe.

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http://www.livejournal.com/users/infoterror/


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blacky
VoivodFan
Member # 2

posted May 11, 2005 14:21     Profile for blacky   Email blacky     Send New Private Message   Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote
quote:
Originally posted by nell:
Hey Blacky! You a Residents fan?

Certainly, The Residents are pretty cool, I only saw them once, but I watched two of their videos a while ago, always very odd but so much surreal and humoristic. I used to listen to them while I was reading Boris Vian(Vernon Sullivan),I Spit on your Grave and Foam of the Daze, he was my favorite writer at the time(88-90) and the Residents - Mark of the mole and Eskimo were my two favorite CDs


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Maldororz
VoivodFan
Member # 186

posted May 11, 2005 16:25     Profile for Maldororz   Email Maldororz     Send New Private Message   Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote
Hey, Boris Vian rules! And yeah, I guess the Residents make a nice soundtrack to his novels, some kind of musical equivalent!

My wife started a master thesis about a Vian novel called l'Arrache-coeur (Heartsnatcher). So we got to read and talk about Vian alot. And Heartsnatcher is my favorite one.

BTW, the TamTamBooks publisher is cool, they have the Serge Gainsbourg novel too!


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ShredTilDead
VoivodFan
Member # 392

posted May 11, 2005 21:25     Profile for ShredTilDead   Email ShredTilDead     Send New Private Message   Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote
The Residents - "Not Available". That's my favorite album by them. The story goes that the Residents recorded this in the 1970s, and decided that they would never release it until they had forgotten about its existence. Apparently they finally did forget about it, because it's been out for a while now.

Very disturbing, in the same way that "Eraserhead" was disturbing, but not really the same.

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My head explodes, my ears ring, I can't remember just where I've been.


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